Gay Marriage – What a Crock

In a classic scene of the movie The Princess Bride the priest at the wedding ceremony asks “Mawage. Wat is mawage? Wuv . . . Twoo wuv!” If you’ve seen this clip then you will know what a ridiculous proposition the entire wedding scene is. The bride and groom don’t like each other let alone love one another. This is a marriage of convenience.

Other story lines show that marriage for love was by far the exception rather than the rule. Think of the popular films Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility and Elizabeth. Would these film’s narratives be nearly as compelling if the main characters simply married out of convenience or because of a dowry? A non-fictional question: Do you really think that King Henry the VIII married his six wives for love?

Marriage for love is a relatively new invention by western society. Marriage itself is a function of the church. Two people can enter into a legally binding long-term relationship at any city hall or county clerk’s office. Heck, you can even get a drive-thru ceremony in Vegas and all of the legal rights conferred upon the couple are valid. These events have nothing to do with religion, but still count the same in society’s mind.

To this day, if a Roman Catholic couple is married anywhere but in the church, then the church does not officially recognize it. Does this mean that their marriage isn’t valid? Of course not.

This is where the gay community is missing the point and losing the hearts and minds of America. It is the prerogative and the right of ANY religious organization to approve or disapprove of gay relationships. Yet we, as a community, are bent on equal rights and the ability to use the term “marriage”. But do we really think that we can gain these rights by trying to litigate and depend on left-leaning courts to shape the public dialogue? We are simply arguing the wrong way.

Bottom line:
The government at all levels should afford for the exact same rights between two people that want to enter into a long-term relationship. This is the right thing to do. Churches should be able to evaluate their doctrinal positions on the issue and be free to decide to bless these relationships or tell them to go to hell. This is the right thing to do.

When we frame this issue this way instead of getting caught up in semantics we allow for a more productive dialogue to move ahead. If we do not, then there will surely be plenty of depressed Princess Buttercups out there for decades to come.

This entry was published on October 15, 2008 at 17:24 and is filed under church, civil unions, gay marriage, religion. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

6 thoughts on “Gay Marriage – What a Crock

  1. Mandy on said:


  2. Mari-eggo on said:

    You fail to take into consideration the fact that marriage between a man and a woman was not created by the Catholic Church, but by God the Father, who is in fact in an eternal marriage himself, and who intended it to take place in a certain manner with certain authority. Marriage is not here because of political reasons. Marrriage and family are eternal truths that exist whether or not our society chooses to believe in them. Don’t forget what you once taught Elder Currey.

  3. Nate C. on said:

    Exactly my point. The LDS Church (or any church for that matter) should be able to have their beliefs and their doctrinal positions on marriage. Furthermore they have every right to defend those beliefs within the context of their own congregations.My argument is leave marriage to the churches to do what they will with it. Civil arrangements between two people should be left to the government and should be fair and equal.And . . . lol . . . I haven’t forgotten what I taught, trust me. But I’ve been out of the LDS Church twice as long as I was in. No regrets, no bitterness, I just don’t believe what I did back when I was 19.

  4. gencstevens on said:

    I agree that religious groups can decide whether they agree to bless these unions or not, but this blog does not adequately discuss how the government fits in….people can be married at a court house with no “blessing” from a religious group. Should people who are gay be able to? I say yes, but I did marry for love (no approval from a religion) … and have many homosexual friends who would like to do the same. It seems the term “marriage” is in question here…just because it is at a court house and not a church it shouldn’t be called marriage? Oh, now I see your follow up and you do believe people should have equal union rights regardless of sexual orientation. So we agree 🙂

  5. Kurt Keyser on said:

    Spot on, my friend. People need to be more level-headed about this issue. Rights and rites should both be protected – intolerant people in any form are just evil. I don’t care if they do call themselves Christians OR “Open-Minded”. Hate in any form is wrong. Protect religious ceremonies such as marriage AND protect civil rights/liberties for ALL! :)And, just for anyone else reading this, Mari-eggo didn’t seem to get your point at all…

  6. ariel on said:

    I meant to comment on this the first time you posted it, and now that things are so intense in CA, I’m glad you brought it up again.I ABSOLUTELY agree with you that this is a stupid semantic argument. Have the state call everything a “civil union” and grant everyone equal rights accordingly, then let the churches decide what they want to sanction as a “marriage”. I’d have my marriage turned in to a “civil union” according to the law with no complaints. The bottom line is that the state can not regulate morality. It’s pointless because there is too much gray.All the ugliness that Prop. 8 is causing just seems to be so hypocritical and contrary to the solution.

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